Profile of a Hokkaido Mama-san
Today, I would like to introduce everyone to Mama-san Makiko, the proprietor of the local Shichi Fuku izakaya, or slosh house. Shichi Fuku is the Japanese equivalent to the American backwoods watering hole, sporting a menu of the greasiest of meaty dishes and the cheapest of low- quality alcoholic beverages. All in all, making this little humble establishment a regular pit stop towards my new total-cardial-destruction-plan.
From an early age, Mama-san Makiko knew where her skills lied – serving copious amounts of alcohol to more than willing recipients. She has henceforth seen her destiny fulfilled as manager and owner of this little Japanese saloon.
But what separates the Hokkaido countryside mama-san from the rest of the same in other parts of Japan? I believe it is hardiness. The hard winter and even harder edge customers make this lot tough as nails, equally surpassed by none. They can drink with the best of them, and that’s saying a lot. Whiskey straight is often the elixir of choice for these pioneering women, with Mama-san Makiko being no exception. To them, drinking is not just a favored activity, but a fundamental part of the mama-san code, akin to Sumo and binge eating. A mama-san who can’t throw down with the best of them won’t last long in this demanding field. This insistent lifestyle will hence often make the rode weary mama-san well aged before her time, giving them a worn, grizzled look, but Mama-san Makiko is one of the exceptions. Pushing 60, she still doesn’t look a day over 55.
However, with regards to their alcohol guzzling tendencies, the only thing that equals their appetite for liquor is the size of their heart. A mama-san will often be the quickest in a small backwater Hokkaido community to embrace and befriend the foreigner in their midst. While others are still scattering in fear at the sight of Mr. White-face futzing around their little nowhere town, the mama-san is pouring another one on the house, for the new exotic wonder.
Thanks Hokkaido mama-sans for being a great friend indeed, in our difficult times of incredible alcoholic need. You’re the best!
posted by The Punisher: at 4:08 PM
6 Comments:
okay, I`ve been quiet for all of 2 nanoseconds and if the rest of yous cant step up...i`m gonna write my ass off. yes for it is my subetsukai and the rabbit ears I stole from the karaoke joint just fell of my head...good work Forrest. keep it up it up. i meant to say more...but, u know how it is. they mine. the rabbit ears r mine. aint no one taken them off this head. shit! my jicho kissed me! (on the cheek) but he`s like totally skebe...
Back and slightly less inebriated. I think I may have witnessed a mama san first last nite.I was actually CUT OFF of karaoke.
It was a big ol snack, and there were many nakagawian "agricultural members" present in addition to my nijikai crew. They just couldn`t keep up with old fast fingers here when it came to the karaoke clicker. My own guys egged me on fatally when they programmed "pretty woman" and told me to sing it cuz I looked like julia roberts (beer goggles anyone?). That began a non-stop assault of celia serenades celia, celia lovin` on celia, celia`s all star tribute to celia, for about 2 hours. I think I did almost the entire madonna old school back catalogue, and I only remembered singing "foxy lady" this morning. around 1:am mama intoned, as I waggled my finger over yet another kylie minouge number in the manner of a very eager drunk puppy, "ONE MORE". So I sang "electrical storm" by U2, walked out with the bar`s rabbit ears still on my head, and rode my mama cheri all round the houses until I accidentally got home.
Yeah yeah forrest, I know..."get your own blog!". Ha
thank you, mama-san for taking care of f-man. I am forever in your debt!!!!!
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